


switcheroo

by pandabrite



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: F/M, M/M, One Shot, just some twin shenanigans and stuff, post story, this is silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-30
Updated: 2017-11-30
Packaged: 2019-02-08 17:15:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12869274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandabrite/pseuds/pandabrite
Summary: lup insists that she needs to do some sleuthing on taako's boyfriend. she trades places with her brother and has a rendezvous with death.





	switcheroo

**Author's Note:**

> day 25 nanowrimo~ the prompt for today was living the day as someone else. i won't lie, i struggled with this one... just a bit. it's mostly just silly and frivolous. hope you enjoy~

“C’mon, Taaaaako.”

Lup stood in front of him, hands curled up beneath her chin, puppy-dog eyes on point… but Taako was impassive.

“Absolutely not.”

“Taaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa-”

“ _Nope._ ”

“-aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaako.”

Lup was inching progressively closer and closer, but Taako stood his ground, even as Lup wrapped her arms around him and planted her face in his chest.

“You’re being ridiculous,” Taako slapped a hand on top of her head, “and that’s, listen, that’s a _lot_ for us. Plus there’s no way in hell this will work. Like, in any stretch of imagination.”

“It used to work,” Lup huffed, and she lifted her face a little to look up at him, a pout pooched on her lips, “we haven’t swapped places in a long time. It’ll be fun~”

“Fun for, what, the five seconds it’ll take to be busted?” Taako pushed his hand on her face-- a mistake-- and then jerked it away when Lup licked it, “ _Gross_ \-- Lulu--”

Lup pranced back away from him, hands on her hips, “It’ll be more than five seconds. We’re waaaay better actors than that. C’mon, you used to _live_ for these dramatics~”

“Sure, I still do, but Barold and Kravitz aren’t going to be duped.”

“You don’t know thaaaat,” she whined, inching closer again, “just for fun. For old time’s sake? We used to do it all the time.”

“Yeah, but… what’s your real angle here?” Taako gave her a shrewd look, and Lup looked briefly stunned, “yeah, see, I got your number. I see right through you.”

“Pffffffffffttttttt,” Lup tried to play it off, but Taako’s stare was impassive, “I-- okay… whatever, Taako, you big jerk. I… well,” she was suddenly hesitant.

“Cough it up.”

Suddenly she looked uncharacteristically abashed, “You’re gonna get mad.”

Taako pooched his lips, an expectant brow lifted.

“I… er, well. Listen, Taako, I just… I… sort of want to… I wanna make sure Kravitz is treating you right, I guess.”

Taako’s expression immediately went from shrewd to… puzzled… too just outright confused, “I don’t follow.”

“It’s not, like, exactly a breadcrumb trail here. It’s as simple as that. I… want to get to know him better, but I want to get to know the _real_ him, you know? Not like… professional-mode-reaper Kravitz, but more like--”

“You want to date my boyfriend?”

“Gross, no. No. No no. Not like that--”

“Because that’s sure what it sounds like. You want you a piece?”

“--Taako, I’m going to fireball you here in like 2.5 seconds if you don’t let me talk.”

“Like, there’s plenty of him to go around, sure, but like this isn’t a fuckin’ buffet, you can’t just cut you off a slice just because you want one--”

“I want to make sure he’s being good to you! You know Barry like the back of your hand, but, like… I guess I just…” Lup huffed and poked her fingers together, “I’ve got to look out for you, you know?”

Taako drug his hand down his own face, “You’ve got to, what, make sure he’s not secretly a shmuck? Like-- you’ve got nothing to worry about, you _know_ that.”

“I…”

“You see him almost more than _I do_ , can you not, just, like, have a fuckin’ conversation like a normal person?” Taako was a little exasperated, it was obvious, but Lup persisted.

“It’s not even just that… I mean, I _try_ , but… he just doesn’t really kick it with us much outside of work, and… he doesn’t talk a whole lot while we’re in business mode? Like, I get he’s not a bad guy, he did spare Barry and I, I know, but… just… He won’t open up to us, you know?”

“Lemme see if I’m following you here,” Taako lifted a hand to keep her from talking, “you want to _trick_ him into opening up to make sure he’s not a jerk, and my word, me, Taako, the guy _dating_ him, means bupkis to you.”

“I mean, that’s… not, that’s…”

“Tell me how that’s not exactly, word for word, what you just said to me?” Taako leaned toward her, and she pouted again.

“C’mon, it’ll be fun, too?”

“Okay, fun for _you_.”

“I’m doing it,” Lup was already pacing across the room toward him, and she snatched Taako’s hat right off of his head. 

“Whatever, knock yourself out. Listen, let’s make this more interesting then… I get _literally_ nothing out of this, Taako is gonna need a little something-something if I’m going to risk letting you make a fool out of me. Let’s see-- hm, okay, I got one: If you get caught, you do my laundry for a month.” Taako looked at his own nails, and Lup grooooooaned.

“Taako, that’s not fair! Half the shit you wear is dryclean only!”

“More than half. Take it or leave it, Lulu.”

“Uggghhhhh--” She huffed and mumbled for a second before straightening back up, “fine. Deal.” She plopped Taako’s hat on her head and placed her hands on her hips, “I’m gonna crush it. I mean,” and her voice dipped a little, lilting into a very Taako drawl, “I’m Taako, you know-”

Taako snorted and put a finger on her mouth to stop her, “put that money where your mouth is. You beef it, you’re gonna get to know Ranald at the laundromat _real_ well.”

“You’re on.” 

\---

“Taako, you didn’t even _try_.”

She wasn’t wrong. Taako hadn’t even bothered to change clothes. 

They’d shown up at a predetermined meeting spot, in front of Lup and Barry’s house, and Lup was gussied to the nines in a very Taako-esque outfit, at least, for a fancy date night. For the things she couldn’t change with just clothes and makeup, she altered with minor illusion magic. No big deal. Point was, aside from her strong stance, she looked _just like Taako._

“I’m not trying to trick _your_ man. He’s gonna know it’s me the second I walk through the door, so what’s the big deal?” 

“Whaaaatever,” Lup tossed her hair, and almost knocked the extra large wizard hat she’d perched on her head right off, “whoops. I don’t understand why you have to always rock these,” she snatched it back up and planted it back on, “it’s not like you’re not a wizard without one.”

“Yeah, but I’m not _Taako_ without one. Anyway, Kravitz is supposed to meet me in Neverwinter in ummm… about thirty minutes. Town square. Same place we met when we went on our second date. You got it?”

“Sure, sure-- I can handle it.”

“I don’t think you can, but I’m lookin’ real forward to changing my clothes three times a day for a month.”

“Taako, you do that anyway.”

Taako waved a hand dismissively and shrugged, “You better get moving, sis. Hope you figure out what you want to figure out, I guess.”

“I got it, I got it. Don’t worry about me~”

“I’m definitely nooooottttttt.”

\--- 

Lup had positioned herself where Taako instructed, and she waited. She didn’t feel particularly nervous, really, but she did feel a vague sense of unease. It had been a long time since she’d posed as her brother-- usually they did it on the Starblaster with mixed results, and they did it all the time as children to get what they wanted from people. Being a twin was an asset back then, especially when no one knew there were two of you.

But… duping Kravitz was a big deal. 

She knew Taako had different faces he wore with people-- what face did he wear with Kravitz, when no one was around to see it? 

Her thoughts were interrupted by the familiar sound of a rift being torn open behind her… and she did a little mental pep-talk-- she had this, she just wanted to learn a little more about Kravitz, and, yeah, sure, maybe she also just wanted to see if she could still pretend to be her brother. Just a little. 

Kravitz was ready for this… he had the script in his mind, already. The first time they’d met outside the moonbase had been here, the first time they’d decided to take the next step, to really see if this could work for them… He had lived a long, long time, but he had a pretty damn good memory, especially for things like this. Things that meant something to him. Things that were special. 

“Hot… Damn, I was not prepared to have my breath taken away, I didn’t know that could still happen to me.” He remarked, just like before, and he prowled around her, eyeing her up and down, “Let me look at you-- you look _amazing._ ” Word for word what he’d said to Taako that night so long ago...

Lup considered this for a moment, watching as Kravitz circled her, as he looked her up and down fondly, “Oooohoooo~” She lilted, “flattery will get you _everywhere_ , my man.”

Kravitz barked a laugh and clapped his hands together, “Good on you, I was hoping you’d remember that,” he seemed quite pleased, and Lup cheesed a little.

“... You don’t got a lot of faith in me if you think I’d forget that easy,” and she winked, a hand on her hip.

…

Kravitz hesitated.

Suddenly he realized, something… was amiss. 

It wasn’t his response, it wasn’t his outfit or his direct appearance… but, something. Something just felt _off._ Something about the way Taako’s shoulders were hanging, languid but just a touch too stiff… too _powerful_ , maybe? And the way he smiled when he answered, his lips curled just a touch higher than they should have, than they had ever before. And his eyes, they… he just wasn’t _looking_ at him the way he usually did. There was _magic_ in Taako’s eyes when they looked at each other, and… it just wasn’t there.

So, what was up, then? Was he sick..? Was he… him..?

Taako(?) seemed to fidget a bit, “Something up?”

“... No, not at all, just counting my lucky stars you’re still here, even after everything…”

… It wasn’t Taako. It was Lup. It hit him suddenly-- the way she stood, even when imitating Taako’s languid stance, was too stiff, too full of energy. She was smiling just a bit too much… and he could see the curve of her lips just… wasn’t Taako. It wasn’t his smile. It wasn’t him. He _knew_ Lup’s face and mannerisms, though maybe not as well as he knew Taako’s. 

What were the two of them playing at?

“Well, you better keep counting,” Lup winked and sidled closer to him, “we got a lot more time to go, yeah?”

“... You’re right. If I waste too much time counting, I won’t get to enjoy the time I’ve got, huh?” Kravitz offered a hand, and waited patiently to see if she would accept it.

Of course, Lup did… she noticed that despite it not being particularly cold outside, he was wearing gloves. She didn’t ask. She let her hand sit comfortably on his palm. She was a little surprised by just how polite that had been-- surely they weren’t this formal with each other all the time?

But, formal it remained. 

Kravitz took them to eat at a fancy little to-do that was hidden down a long flight of stairs, right off the busiest street in the business district of Neverwinter.

And… she was surprised by just how simple this whole dating Kravitz thing was. 

Kravitz was easy enough to talk to, and such a damn gentleman it seemed almost out of place. They shot the shit for a while, and Lup avoided carefully any conversation thread she thought might give her away. Mostly, she let Kravitz talk, and when he wasn’t at work, when they weren’t in business mode as reapers, he certainly could talk.

He remarked about the food, asked her what she thought of it, dunked on the gaudy aesthetic of the too-fancy decor, then introspectively reminded apparently both himself and his partner that their own home wasn’t that much better, was it?

He was open and amiable and funny. The entire time, he didn’t take his eyes off of her.

The entire time, he kept his hands to himself.

Except when they got up from the table to head out, and he offered her a hand to help her out of her seat.

“Let’s blow this popsicle stand, shall we?”

“Hell yeah, lemme tell you, I could have given you a better meal than this at home, no need for dropping that much scratch. Pretty basic, honestly, if you ask me.”

“I know, I know,” Kravitz held Lup’s hand and led them out of the winding staircase, and back onto the dimly lit neverwinter streets, “speaking of home, I think… I think I’ll be heading there shortly.”

Lup froze, and after a moment, she responded, “Checking out kind of early, don’t you think?”

“Well,” Kravitz paused, “I had a lot more planned, but, um, it might be a little awkward if we go that route. … I have to say, Lup, it was quite nice to share a meal with you, but I’d very much like to see _my_ boyfriend, if you don’t mind?”

“... Fuck.”

“Yeah, I know. Sorry, I should have called you out from the beginning,” Kravtiz scratched his own cheek, looking sort of pleased with himself, “let me also throw this out here, um… if you wanted to get to know me, you could have just asked? I’m not in the business of keeping any secrets from my boyfriend’s sister.”

“... Just, I… erm,” Lup huffed, “well, this sucks. I got bamboozled when I was trying to bamboozle. I sort of kind of hate this,” and she realized quickly that everything she’d figured out, or at least tried to figure out, was pretty much pointless if he knew it was her the entire time. 

Kravitz chuckled-- any animosity he felt had abated quickly enough. It wasn’t as though they were _strangers_... it just-- it was overwhelming in a lot of ways. He had spent so much of his life alone that suddenly being surrounded by all these new friends, these new coworkers, this new _family_... it was tough to get used to. He would come out of his shell soon enough for the lot of them eventually.

“Did you figure out what you wanted to know?” Kravitz asked languidly, and he offered her his arm. 

Lup hesitated for a moment, but eventually she did lace arms with him, and the magic she used to emulate Taako’s physique faded, “... I mean, I guess..? I don’t really know…”

“Well, like I said, we can… you know, talk? You don’t have to sneak around, Lup.” He was walking her back toward the outskirts of the city, toward their homes.

“I know, I know,” Lup looked away, wrinkling her nose a bit in annoyance. She felt silly. She knew she was taking a risk, but it had been impulsive and possibly not super well thought out, “I shouldn’t have tried to trick you.”

“You really did a very good job,” Kravitz looked smug, “I just know Taako well enough to see the difference.”

Lup fell quiet. She allowed them to walk in silence all the way back to the outskirts of the city, and why they didn’t just use their reaper powers to get there was beyond her… but it was whatever, right? 

When they reached the home she shared with Barry, she let herself in, “Come in. He’s here.”

Kravitz obliged, allowing himself inside after her. A warm, comfortable abode. Just a touch of Taaco-esque extra, tempered by academia and various books and scrolls. Barry and Taako were seated on a low couch in the living room, playing cards.

As soon as Kravitz saw Taako… his expression softened. Lup saw it, keen eyes focused in on Kravitz as he approached her brother, as he scooped him off of the couch and into his arms, as he peppered his face with kisses.

Taako let himself fall a bit limp in Kravitz’s arms, and he looked at Lup with a shit-eating smirk plastered all over his face, “Sup, laundry girl.”

“Ugh--” Lup rubbed her face and flopped down next to Barry, who wrapped an arm around her.

“Laundry lady?” He looked vaguely concerned, but there was a _hint_ of amusement there.

“Yeah-- ugh, yeah… we made a bet as to whether or not I got caught.” She sighed and flopped her face on Barry’s shoulder.

Kravitz perked a bit, “You all here makin’ bets and not including me in them? Not fair, not fair.”

“She can just do _your_ laundry too,” Taako nudged Kravitz, who huffed in response.

“No, no, I’ll get in on it eventually, love,” he pressed his lips against Taako’s temple, “anyway, he and I, we have a date to finish. Should I take you to eat, too? I’ll sit through another meal for you.”

“Sure, if you’re willing to cough up for feeding two of us.”

“Always, always,” he glanced at Lup and Barry once more, and set Taako down on his feet, “I’ll see you two at work. And, Lup, no more swapping, alright? Just be yourself, we’ll get on fine… as long as you’re not setting any more bounties on fire.”

Lup looked smug, “... hmmm, we’ll see.”

“Ta ta, then~” Kravitz and Taako excused themselves, but not before Taako leaned back in the doorway and gave Lup one last wildly smirking grin before taking off.

“So,” Barry settled down next to Lup a little more comfortably, and he watched her face for a moment before speaking again, “did you find out what you wanted?”

… She was briefly quiet, contemplating her answer. At first, she wasn’t sure, but… seeing Kravtiz’s face instantly soften at the sight of Taako, who immediately seemed magnetically pulled to him… To see him sweep him off of his feet and litter kisses anywhere he could reach… It seemed like, well, he was alright. Taako deserved only the best, and… Kravitz seemed pretty damn near that.

“Yeah, I think so.”


End file.
